How I Plan on Breaking the Guinness World Record for Poker Endurance

by Phil

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I still remember to this day looking through an old copy of the Guinness Book of World Records.  I read it from cover to cover.  It wasn’t long before I started thinking of breaking one of these records and getting myself into that book.  There were a few that I thought I had a shot at.

I remember two of them.  Pogo stick hops and memorizing pi.  Basically drawn dead and not knowing it I made a few futile attempts at both of these and soon learned the harsh but real truth.  Getting the record for something when you are up against billions of people is more difficult then I had suspected.  At one point I even entertained the idea of starting a new category.  Of course, that went nowhere as well, and by the time High School rolled around I had accepted my fate.  Getting into the Guinness Book of World Records wasn’t going to be happening for me.  Ok, no worries, move on.

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Cut to about 8 years ago I found myself playing an enduro session of poker.  Over time I played maybe about 10 or so of these enduro sessions (all between 40 and 60 hours) and it got me to thinking.  

Maybe getting into that book is not so far fetched after all.  Maybe, just maybe this could be it!  There were only three things in the way.

1) I always seemed to fall asleep at the table.

2) Every few years the record got harder and harder to beat.  (Others were thinking the same thing as me!)  And…

3) With each new enduro session getting it done took more effort than the one before.

On the plus side…

1) I know that deep down in me is a machine that seems fueled by the impossibility of it all.

2) If I knew I was going for an official record, then maybe I could dodge the ‘between hand naps’ altogether.  

And let’s face it, what would life be without challenges?  Well, it would be living I suppose, but just not as fun.  And fun is a major tenet in my life philosophy so I thought I would give it a try.

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Anyway, I have been training since January 1 for this event.  Time to beat:  78 hours.  Held by my buddy from across the pond, Paul Zimbler.

What have I been doing to train you ask?  Good question.  Basically here is the run down.

Essentially I broke it down into three components.  Body, mind, and spirit.

 

For my BODY:

I have been running, swimming, or going to the gym 5 times a week.

I have kept a tight leash on what I put into my body food wise.  Great diet. (Special emphasis on not eating anything fried, cheese, or ice cream.) (By the way, I really love popcorn shrimp, fried calamari, mint flavored ice cream and Gouda cheese.)  But more on this under ‘Spirit”.

 

For my MIND:

Every time I was eating well or at the gym I tried to remind myself that through these actions breaking the record would become effortless.  (Neuro-linguistic programming at work.)

 

For my SPIRIT:

Each time I see fried food, cheese and ice cream I converted those food items into trigger points of effortless detachment.  The thinking goes like this.  By training myself to not want things I want very much, I will be ready and prepared to effortlessly not want the sleep that my body will inevitably want VERY badly.  6 months of training of not getting what I want will give me the much needed edge I will need.

If mint ice cream happens to be in front of me, now instead of craving it (or any of my other favorite foods) I am reminded of how effortless it is to not want the things I want.  My will power is at an all time life high because of this.

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For what it’s worth.  This training did not come from some secret military training manual or anything.  I came up with all of this on my own.  It may sound like a crack pot sort of training regimen but to be honest… every time I look at it, it seems genius.  Maybe it is in some sort of weird top secret military manual and we just have never seen it.  Titled… “How to beat the need for sleep on weird navy recon spy missions” or something like that. 

How do I feel today?

My weight has dropped from 211 to 190.  I feel fantastic.  My will power is at an all time high, and I am ready to take on this challenge.

The Bellagio has agreed to host this event.  I plan on starting at noon on the 2nd of June.  And my goal is to get to 80 hours.

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I have played many enduro sessions of poker, but never anything of this magnitude.  I know this will test my limits but I love a good challenge and am excited to be trying to beat this record in Vegas’ top poker room.

Good luck to me!

Phil Laak

Degen for Life

Random Movies

by Phil

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It seems like I have seen quite of few movies lately and never got around to ranking them....

Here we go... (and if I have given my thoughts earlier... well... I only hope that my ranking and thoughts are similar to what I wrote before.)

A Single Man:  Ford put crazy effort into making sure that every scene was super stylistic and slick.  Each scene was made paying mad attention to all sorts
of details.  He created a very stylized bit of a movie.  The movie itself was cool too.  Abouut a man in love, his lover dies, he is bummed, and right as he is
on the brink of taking his life, he finds reason to live (another man) and then tragically has a heart attack and dies anyway.  It is all played out over the span of
one day.  (my grade.  80)
 
Armored:  This was about the most painful movie I have seen in a long while.  Wow.  And not just regular pain, but really high level head splitting pain.  How the hell can a guy like Laurence Fishburne be in the coolest movie ever (Matrix) and the most painful waste of time movie (nearly) ever will be a mystery to me.  (But oddly he will most likely never know how bad the movie was - why?  Well, think about it.  Who does Laurence know that will tell him he just made one of the worst movies ever?  Nobody.)  Whatever.  Pointless movie.  My grade.  35.  Yes.  (That is on the 1 -100 scale.)  By the way... (It might be a 10 all thru a 59, not sure really... when they are this bad it is hard to tell.)

Avatar:  This flick was amazing.  I should see it again.  (my grade.  93)

The Blind Side:  Wasn't planning on seeing this one (because it looks lame) but then I found out that one of my favorite author's (Michael Lewis - The Big Short, Liar's Poker) wrote the book that the movie was based on.  So now I will see it.  But I expect it is going to be lame.  At least the previews made gave me that impression.  So we will see on that.

The Book of Eli:  Doomsday, dark times in the future.  This was supposed to be a lame movie, and well, in a way it was.  But I still liked it.  I love Gary Oldman, and I thought Mila Kunis was cool enough in this flick.  I have a soft spot for unrealistic fight scenes in the dark and gloomy future, and this movie had a lot of that.  (my grade. 75)

Edge of Darkness:  Wow.  Just goes to show you that kings can fall.  I mean, lets face it, Mad Max with Mel Gibson back in the day was the nuts (95 for its time), and now he got involved in this pile of dribble.  Very painful.  Slow, and pointless.  (my grade. 65)

Gentlemen Broncos:  What a whack fun wierd off beat flick this was.  Super off beat, surreal comedy about a young sci-fi writer, whose story is stolen and turned into a best seller.  Nothing like a regular movie AT ALL.  But I like it.  (my grade.  78.)

Jennifer's Body:  I think I gave a grade on this one already, but it would be a sin if I only thought I did, but missed it.  This was a fun flick about a high school girl possessed by a hungry demon (her hunger is satisfied by eating her dates and so forth throughout the movie.)  It was way better than most movies like this in this genre.  (my grade.  82)

Percy Jackson & The Lightninig Thief:  (I was on a plane, what can I say?).  I am always down for kid's flicks.  I am expert at reverting to my 14 yr old brain.  I have managed to see many kids movies this way.  And grade them as if I was that same 14.  But no matter how I tried I just couldn't find anything good about this flick.  It was more or less a waste of time.  (my grade. (from the 14 yr old perspective)  68 or so.)

What else.. what am I forgetting...

oh yeah...

Iron Man 2:  I liked it.  Obv.  I actually liked this one more than Iron Man 2.  (I think that I was in the minority here.)  (my grade.  80)

Kick-Ass:  Everyone loved this movie for some reason.  There were some great parts, and decent bits here and there, but it didn't hit me like it hit everyone else.  (my grade.  78)

Youth in Revolt:  This was an absolute must see movie.  Michael Cera is a genius and he has made cinema gold.  Teenage love story.  Brilliant.  (my grade.  93)

Hot Tub Time Machine:  Please see this movie.  Wow.  Pure gold.  (my grade.  90)

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And now I want to end on this note.  My prediction for the coolest movie since Matrix.  (And please let me be right here.)

           INCEPTION!!  (Hit's the theaters on July 16th)

Oh my oh my.  The trailers look about as cool as it gets.  (The new DiCaprio flick)


That is it for now.

Phil.

Quick Update

by Phil

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My life in a nutshell for the last bit.
London.  Poker.  Won.  (and my girl did too.)(more than me in fact!)  Viffer killed nearly everyone (so happy to have emerged as one of the top 5 winners.
(It was for a televised poker thing for Euroland.)

Volcanic ash disrupts travel plans back to Vegas.  No more Belly 25k for me.

Waited a bit more in London then went to Monte Carlo.  Played.  Got my ass handed to me.

Monte Carlo Highlights.

Lots of steps for sick workouts.
Sat next to Viktor Blom for high roller turny.  (mini brag)
Had lots of quality time with Neil Channing, John Duthie, and even a little with my ol' buddy Haralabob Voulgaris.
Watched a bit of the Gran Prix stuff (pre-lims).
Got quality time with Sander Lyloff, and saw a bit of Gus too.  Some back gammon stuff happened.  And except for getting my ass handed to me I enjoyed.
The shrimp pasta thing at the hotel was AMAZING.

Monte Carlo Low-lights

Shower in room was spastic and pathetic. 
Internet at the Hotel was third world at best.
All the poker residents got hustled on the breakfast thing.  Supposed to be added.  It was.  But it was not the regular breakfast place (good) in
the hotel.  Instead we were all treated like animals and had to eat gruel in the basement.  THIS IS NOT A LIE.  It was sick how awful the whole thing was. 
I hate getting hustled.  And on this one, we all got the 'Hustle Royal'.
Lost a lot of money.  (Total trip in Euroland was for sure nasty.)

Random Sightings.

On plane ride home, Jermaine Jackson (music) and Michael Madsen (movies) were both on the same flight.  (Madsen was in Euroland for the Gumball rally thing.)(Jennifer has
done some flicks with him so they chatted.  I was asleep and never got to say hello.  Which I would have for sure done.  He was so mega sick in Reservoir Dogs.)

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In LA now.
Off to Vegas in 40 mins.
Playing in a thing called the "Doubles Poker Championship."
32 players.  50k. (1.6 mil total, and they are adding 400k to prize money.)
I love the added prize money thing.  Not so convinced that doubles poker is a good idea.
Seems like it goes against the very fabric of poker.  We will see.

My team matches (random draw) are going to be with

Andy Bloch
Mike the Mouth
Phil Ivey
David Chiu

I am most happy about the pair up with the Mouth.  I love this guy.  He is always makes me happy.
He is always in story telling mode.  And he has fun stories.  I also love how in his mind all poker players
(winning or not) suck.  Except maybe two or three.  I can't remember.  Anyway.  Looking forward to being
entertained.

And the most interesting pairing for me will be Ivey.  He is of course Ivey, and a legend and all that stuff, but aside from
that I really have never hung out with him.  So it will be like in 3rd grade when you get paired up with the mega popular
super hero kid on a team assignment.   I will be the wing man here (obv) and I think it will be interesting.
Other than HSP and one or two tournies we have not really played together.  For this event, instead
of being adversaries at the table, we will be allies.  Should be interesting.  Hoping to learn something along the way too.

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On the 8th I will be playing in the "Big Game" - which is a 200 400 televised game with antes - 6 handed.  Cool.

And if I don't get my ass cracking I am going to miss my flight.

Later
Phil Laak
Degen for Life

Random Thoughts from Monte Carlo

by Phil

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Busted on Day One.  Blah.  Since then I have chilled at the pool, gone to the gym and had lovely little meals here and there.

But I would (obv) much prefer to be in the tourney still.  But ho hum, what can you do?

The one thing I love about this event is that the hotel is at the bottom of a huge cliff sort of hill thing, and there is a set of stairs that goes straight up the cliff
for about a half a mile.  Threee nights ago I ran the steps.  Twice!  Wow, I was fully spent.  It was very hard to do, and am stoked. (Am I? Not sure, but without at least saying that I am, then I have no shot at hitting it again, and that is what I plan on doing today.)  (I am a sick one, yes.)

Manana is the High Roller event.  More sickness.  The mega high entry fee's on the events that have been lurking about really put things into perspective.  25,500 Euros ($39,915).  How did I get here?  How the hell can I plunk down 40k on a poker tourney.  And then I realize that I got here by grinding.  I started small 10 years ago and have been running good (more or less) the whole time.  And I see what Stu Unger was talking about when they asked him what he was going to do with his prize money.  And he answered, "Gamble higher."  I get it.  But it is still fairly sick.  But it is my drug and I can't live without it so plunk I will, as plunk I must.

Reminds me of a funny moment about 10 years ago when I took a call from my mom during a poker game.  She asked how it was going.  I replied, "Up $3,000."  She thought it would be a good idea to quit.  Lol.  I said that I loved that idea but first I needed to know when I was to play again.  She replied that I should just quit up a winner.  I asked her that months or years later when my bankroll went to zero and it was time to eat, what should I do?  And then she understood.  (Sort of.) 

It is always funny how to me how poker players understand all this stuff and non-poker players really, in the end, just don't.

Like how it is normal for a 1/2 nlh player to not really be all that amazed by the big numbers that switch hands in the nose bleed games.  But a guy buying and selling houses or cars or something - or a high priced doctor or what have you.  How when they hear about those big games they are just flabberghasted by the whole thing.

All this got me to thinking what makes a successful gambler in the first place.  And then I was happy because I had already done the work here and knew the answer.

The trick is this.  (The answer is two fold.)  (By the way, the obvious postulate here is that you are a winning card player and your bankroll is steadily rising.)  That being said, the two fold way to success as a poker player is....   

1.) To find plus ev places to have your money work for you while you are not playing cards.  I have had some blunders in this dept, but by not giving up I have managed to sort of figure it out.  It is harder to do then playing cards but the benefits are huge and it feels great when things click money wise outside of poker. 

and two...

2) You must take advantage of the fact that you are essentially free to do as you please.  And actually do other stuff then playing cards.  I am good with my time away from the cards.  And continue to look for ways to get even better at it.  

And that makes me happy.  And happiness is good.